I Love You, Too!

Here I am coming off an Easter high...no wait, I am not coming off, I am continuing an Easter high with Jesus Christ and He continues to teach me. 

This season I have been extra aware of the sacrifice Jesus Christ has poured out on each of us.  I have been reading several books that have really captivated my attention toward God and reallocated my attentiveness.  He loved us so much he layed down His life for us.  Please, please do not let the commonality of this saying allow you to take it lightly.  He gave up His life.  For You.  For Me. For that person you struggle to get along with.  He died for us all.  Willingly.  I am an unworthy sinner...I can not even give 1 whole day to Him in it's entirety, yet, he DIED...for me.

Maybe you are thinking, OK, Kirsten.  I get the point.  I've heard it hundreds of times and I am thankful too. 

But, I just like to sit and relish in His love for me.  I am blessed with a family and many close friends who love me very well.  But, nothing compares to the love that Jesus Christ showed and continues to show each moment of my life. 

I was sitting here looking at some recipes and cleaning out my binder to make room for the new recipes (and take out the ones that were tried and not so appealing) and I decided to put in a Beth Moore devotional CD that I bought over the weekend.  I got to a message entitled Breaking Free.  I was listening half heartedly and semi attentively (of course leaving some attention to reading my recipes in the midst of the CD).  Then she mentioned a challenge to the listeners.  Beth asked that when ever we want to say "I love you, Lord" to in fact say, "I love you, too".  "When we are feeling like we want to express our love to Him, He has already showed us His love and we are reciprocating that thought back to Him. And, never, ever will you ever say I love you and He has not just said it to you.  He is the initiator of love.  He is the source of love. " The only reason I can love Him is because God is the initiator of Love and has loved me first!

Thank you, Beth Moore, for this reminder of great love and for the challenge to remember that He is the source and initiator of love. 

God, Please help me to be more reciprocal of this GREAT gift.  Help me to love you well.

No TV is liked by Me

Zack's school has given the challenge to families of turning off their tv for a week.  7 days of no watching tv.  It has been interesting to comply with this request.  Our routine weekday screen time was for about 30 minutes in the mornings before school, then occasionally after school for 30-45 minutes.  The weekends are a bit more with Sunday mornings before church shows and Saturday morning cartoons and sometimes some Wii in the afternoon.  I do not think it is excessive, but I always prefer other things for the boys over tv.
Anyway, here is our past several days...
Day 1 (We started on Sunday)  The kids asked probably a dozen times if they could watch something.  It is after all, their favorite day to watch tv, especially in the mornings.  Dan and I reminded them each time that there would not be tv.  It was a big adjustment (yes, I am embarrassed that it was so difficult!).
Day 2 We were very busy this day, visiting friends and having a late meal so it was not even thought about...Yea!
Day 3 This was also a busy day although they asked to watch after school a couple times.  Both Zack and Owen asked me (in hopes that I would say yes to one of them I think!) but I held firm.  They found alternative things to do and moved on quite quickly. 
Day 4 The kids did not even ask to watch although they had several moments of not knowing what to do. 
Day 5 Again, the kids did not ask to watch.
Day 6 (today) they have not asked to watch and it is a day off from school.  I am so proud of them. 
I am really enjoying them finding alternative ways to enjoy the day.  There is much less fussing and whining.  I have attributed that to tv too.  For some reason the kids can get so grumpy when it is time to turn off the tv or to turn off video games.  I have never understood this.   And, because they have poor attitudes it has limited much of the games they are "allowed" to play and limited the amount of tv watching they are able to watch. 
So, instead of tv, we have replaced it with things that are fun and that occupy some down time.  Today, we had a busy day getting ready to go to MN for Easter.  The kids and I cleaned the playroom (a bit too long awaited if you ask me!), we went to the library, and then the grocery store to get a couple ingredients to make dirt cake, they helped with some laundry and did a couple outside jobs to help me get extra stuff out for the garbage man.  Then, after lunch the kids and I made the dirt cake to bring to MN and the boys have been playing...without asking to watch tv!  I also have plans to make some donut muffins http://www.kingarthurflour.com/recipes/doughnut-muffins-recipe to have for breakfast tomorrow.  Then, it will be off to MN! 
This no tv thing...I am really liking it!  I am looking forward to warm weather that will be incentive to permanently replace much screen time by enjoying creation. 
As for the past 6 days, I am proud of my boys for their lack of tv!

The Judgement Factor

I am not God.  Seems quite obvious to you.  But, I need a reminder every now and then.  It gets so comfortable for me to complain about how other people do things.  I have the audacity to think that my way is the best or only way and everyone else's is skewed somehow if it does not follow my way of thinking.  I have realized lately that my judgement factor on others has been too harsh and is shameful.  Many of us are trying hard to be obedient to His calling.  When I say someone is wrong, then I am attempting to be omniscient.  There is only One who is omniscient...and suffice to say, it is not me.  (I am sorry if I have shocked you!) :) 

Being a parent, it is easy to judge other parents and how they raise their children.  When their style does not match mine closely I can get thoughts of "if only they did this differently".  I do not want to carry around those feelings.  I want to carry around feelings of compassion toward the children and the parents.  In an honest evaluation, it is quite obvious that parents are never going to agree with other parents 100% in their upbringing of children.  It is also quite obvious that no set of children are exactly like another set of children.  We were all created uniquely in God's image and He has blessed us with the family he gave us and hand picked the children especially for our family's.  It is easy to say "You are wrong to..." and "if only..."  in regards to how parents parent their children.   But, those children have different demeanors and attitudes from my children.  What may work for mine, may not work for yours...and what works for yours may not work for mine.

It is not my place to judge your family, nor is it your place to judge mine.  Psalm 96:13 says: Let all creation rejoice before the LORD, for he comes, he comes to judge the earth. He will judge the world in righteousness and the peoples in his faithfulness.  So, according to this verse, it is not for us to judge, but it IS my place to rejoice before the Lord.  I need to leave the judging to the true Judge.  The God of the Heavens and Earth.  The God of Creation.  The Maker of families and the human race.  I did not make the world and do not know the situations that God is working on in each family.  I do know that He will be judging with equity (the achievement of fairness). 

I have been thinking about this topic for quite a while now.  I want to have boldness if God wants to use me, but I want to know the difference between boldness and animadversion.   I hope that I am not alone in this whole judgement discussion and working on humility and parting ways with sinful thoughts...well, rethinking that...I hope that I AM alone and that now we can move on and REJOICE before the Lord together!!

We are off!!

Wess Stafford moved up toward the top of my admiration ladder this week.  (Not THE top...but quite high.)  I have been reading a book he wrote titled "Too Small to Ignore".  It talks about how children are not viewed to be as important as Jesus wants them to be.  It also tells about Wess's upbringing as a Missionary kid in Neille, Africa.  There was no competition because everyone helped each other so they were all equal.  There was no judging because if someone had less than you, then you would share what you have until they had the same thing (to the extent that many often had just one sandal because they gave the match to someone who did not have any!).  There was no triumphing over a win because that would entail a loser and they did not want others to feel less of a person. 
There are so many great emphases in this book and it gave me such a different view of kids. Here there are struggles to get coaches for kids sports, and it is near impossible to get enough volunteers to teach Sunday school to the kids.  Kids are just sluffed off and not given the same value as an adult.  It is like we are waiting until they grow up before they reach their full value or worth. 
We are so off!!  Jesus makes it perfectly clear that children are precious!  There are several verses in Matthew that talk about how Jesus feels about children.  "Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of Heaven." And, "Whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me."  Stafford writes, "One would think that a great new respect and appreciation for children would have seized the hearts of those who heard His message.  A whole new theology should have arisen that placed children at the center of the work of the church...The words of Jesus couldn't have been any clearer...How unbelievable the church would have forgotten this for the next 2000+ years!"  It really is amazing that we have degraded children to stay only with other children (and the lacking number of volunteers) and not with adults and to view them as mere distractions if they are in a larger group.  Why is it so difficult to integrate them into our society and culture with the same value as an adult?  
After reading this book, I have gained such valuable insight.  It has given me a greater appreciation of my own children as well as others.  God has entrusted us with helpless newborns to raise and direct in His ways.  That is no small feat!  And, it is no small honor!  I have now added to my prayer list of asking God to grow my desire to love, cherish, appreciate and help protect His gifts (children) more than ever. (Mine and any others I cross paths with) I know it is not often an easy thought to put into action.

So, speaking of putting into action my thoughts, I had the opportunity to do just that this morning.  It was the first Saturday morning soccer game for Zack and Owen.  It starts at 9am...did I mention it was a Saturday?  I had not been looking forward this time for several weeks because I like to be lazy on Saturday mornings.   (Although I have been mulling over Proverbs 6:6 from a sermon given not long ago that says "Go to the ant, you sluggard, and consider its ways and be wise".  This means essentially, DON"T BE LAZY!.  So I have these thoughts in my head...children are valuable and need attention and to not be second rate and don't be lazy.  What does that equal?  Kirsten, get your bottom out of bed and joyfully (yes, JOYFULLY!) go watch your precious children play soccer on a Saturday morning.  And I did.  Now I have to work on being content and hopefully, eventually, joyful about cloudy, cool, damp windy Saturday mornings!  But, none the less, I enjoyed watching my kiddos play a sport they enjoy and I was a proud mommy sitting on the cool, damp and windy sidelines!  Thanks Wess for the timely reminder of the value of children.  I hope I can keep growing my actions toward them to make Jesus proud.

It's a War Zone

In my daily time with God I have been in pursuit of added intimacy with my Savior.  I know this will not often happen when I offer mere minuscule moments to Him without focus.  However, last night, I wanted to "get it over with" so I could get on with my reading in a book.  (I have decided to read my Bible or the Daily Bread devotional before I read for pleasure so that I do not put it off until I am too tired.)  It is easy to make excuses as to why I do not need to read and investigate more in my Bible but they are reasons that push me farther from the Rock.  And, coincidentally, the book I was reading for pleasure was a book subtitled "Arranging Our Lives for Spiritual Transformation" which talks about creating a lifestyle that optimizes ways to serve, worship and grow in God.  That certainly is not done by rushing through Quiet time with Him! 
Anyway, aside from the irony of trying to rush through my Bible time to read this book, I did the quick version by reading the Daily Bread.  I had a rare moment of an impactful message during a "get it over with" quiet time.  The passage that it highlighted was 2 Timothy 2:1-7.  Although the whole section is good, the verse that especially spoke to me last night was verse 4.  It says "No one engaged in warfare entangles himself with the affairs of this life, that he may please him who enlisted him as soldier." I really appreciated this verse.  It helped to remind me that we need to let go of petty and insignificant battles that are meaningless in the scheme of His plan.  If we are wasting our energy, time, funds, thoughts etc. on meaningless affairs, we have lost sight of the big picture.  I can get frustrated when the gas light comes on in the car and I was not the last one to drive it and I can be selfish in thinking I should not have to do all the laundry myself and I can be just wrong when I think that people should only watch what I think is acceptable at the theater.  But, these are not causes to squabble about because they are pointless when it comes to the purpose of life.
In the devotion part of this day's reading Hia states: "There are many attractive things in our world that are so easy to get entangled with-hobbies, sports, TV etc.  These start off as "refueling" activities but later they can take up so much of our time and thought that they interfere with the purpose for which God created us; to share the good news of Christ, serve Him with our gifts and bring glory to Him."  Our job is to please Him.  I want to be purposeful in pleasing Him.  I want to be purposeful in using the gifts He gave me to serve Him.  I want to be purposeful in bringing Him the glory.
I am enlisted in His army.  "Although I live in this world, I must declare my allegiance to Heaven."

Lame Excitement

Have you ever been so excited over something that no one else would feel the same way about?  Well, tonight it happened to me!  I have had a terrible and discouraging time trying to keep our bathrooms smelling presentable.  I felt like I had tried it all!  I went through so many cleaning methods and types of cleaners and they all had the same result.  I never got the smell away that I was sensitive to.  I disguised it quite well with Bath and Body Works air fresheners for a long time. 
Well, today I decided to give the cleaning/cleaners isle at Super Walmart (Super Walmart means there are the most choices out of any store around so it has to be the best option to search for products, right?!) another chance.  I perused the isle, as the boys impatiently waited to get to the yogurt section, and I thought...hmmm...something with bleach.  Maybe I should try that one!  (I had never tried bleach, for some odd reason).  So, I plucked the newest selection off the top shelf.  Chlorox Clean-Up with Bleach-fresh scent. 
I finished up at the store and brought my product home.  I put all the purchased items away except for the toothpaste and the cleaner.  I set them on the stairs to go upstairs but with it sitting out, it was achieving some subliminal osmosis (or something) and encouraged me to give it a try before I finished off my previous cleaning fluid.  So, this evening before supper, while the kids were occupied with a basketball game, I took out the rubber gloves, a rag and the new cleaner.  I started spraying and was thinking, "Wow!  This really smells like bleach!" It was not enjoyable as I suffered through the cleaning process...BUT...when I was done...even the kids bathroom smelled fresh and CLEAN!  So clean, that is almost smelled pool-like or hotel-like.  What a lovely smell!  It was a moment (or several!) of Lame Excitement! :)


My weapon of choice to fight the bathrooms.