Growing

There are so many stages of growing, both as a child and as an adult.  Last weekend was the beginning of a new stage.  Perhaps it does not seem big to you, but it is huge to me!  My kids have taken to calling me Mom.  Not Mommy.  Not Mama. Not Muma.  Mom.  I have been dreading the day for years.  I have, in the past, corrected them when they had a "slip" and said Mom instead of Mommy or Mama.  I still cringe when I hear my new title. 

They can not be old enough to call me that, can they? 

I suppose it was inevitable.  I am trying to accept this new title graciously.  I still have a long way to go to be successful in that goal.  But I'm trying!

It is interesting how we as adults grow in our knowledge of Christ that we can revert back to childhood and desire the father/daughter (son) relationship of protection.  We learn more about Him and we are reacquainted with how little we know about Him.  The more we learn, the more we know we need to learn.  Also, as I grow, I want more and more be be held "in the shadow of His wing".  I want the ultimate protection that only He can provide.  I want to be the one with the childlike faith and want to be more and more in awe of our Creator.  I am taken care of by my Abba, my Daddy.  I am safe and secure in Him.  As I grow older and as I grow closer to God, the knowledge that I have grows I become more and more of a reliant child. 

As my children are feeling older and perhaps more independent calling me Mom, I want just the opposite (for myself and for them!) in our Christian walk.  Abba father is the title I strive for.  God is the title for the Creator and God of the Universe.  Abba is the title of my protector, guide, hope, and many other intimate relational helps.

I want to feel like I have an Abba/Kirsten relationship with God the Father.  And, I want to be the best "Mom" I can to my growing children.

Call To Worship

I sat down to eat my humble sandwich dinner of cheese and butter on 9 grain bread and thought, I want to write a blog tonight.  So, my next task-figure out what I want to write about. 

I walked over to the cupboard to round out my "dinner" with some Wheat Thins.  I put my small used plate (from my sandwich) on the counter and thought...hmmm, I can use this plate and put some crackers on there.  So I pulled the cracker box off the shelf and walked to the counter to fill my plate and saw a paper that said "Call to Worship" on it.  Perfect.  That inspiring line will be my focal point.

In all things we are called to worship.  When things are not going as we desire, we are called to worship.  When moments are overflowing with evident blessings, we are called to worship.  When times are frustrating, yet again, we are called to worship. 

It is so easy to worship out of thanksgiving when we receive something that we have been waiting for or when we are pleased with how life is going.  But, what about those times where everything is not just as you would like.  What about those times when your defiant child is being, well, defiant?  What about those times where your plans are changed and you did not want them to be changed.  What about those times where a loved one is hurt emotionally or physically?  What about when honesty does not prevail a hierarchy of politics in the business environment?  What if all my "what if" examples occurred today and I was feeling overwhelmed with sadness in many areas?  Yes, it is then that I need to remember we are called to worship in the good times and bad.  

One of my remembered quotes from my father-in-law is "Nothing is a surprise to God."  God knows what is occurring in everyone's life as well as in everyone's heart.  He knows where we need to rely more on him and He knows where we feel solid in Him.  God is available as a friend, mentor, encourager, and supporter.  My job is to give Him the worship He deserves (in all circumstances!) and to turn my burdens over to Him. 

For my child who is having moments of deviancy, I pray God will soften his sweet heart to be more loving, gentle and rational with ears and a tongue of respect.  For my plans that were changed this morning, I thank you God that I had prayer time at home instead of at church because apparently my prayers were needed to be focused on where I was this morning, at home.  To my friend who is emotionally hurting after job complications, I pray God uses this time as a refreshment and that there is something great waiting for your sweet compassionate ways.  To my friend who is struggling with business hierarchy, I pray that you will be a bright light to those around you and not feel guilty for doing your job well.  For the sadness that I experience, God I pray that it is a compassion that never ceases for people. 

I worship You God for who you are (GOD!) and for how You comfort and care for each of us. You deserve to be worshipped and I want to be one falling at Your feet giving you all the praise I can muster, in good times and in bad.  



From each cloud and below to each blade of grass and above, in all things, I worship You.



For the Love of Flowers

I have been in awe of flowers this spring.  The intensity of my admiration for the beauties grows each year.  I have a hunch that it is due to the significance of warmth that is approaching and snowy days are of the past but none the less, I am appreciating flowers greatly.  I also am enjoying experimenting with my camera.  I know I am by no means a great photographer, but hey...I enjoy the hobby none the less.
God has given me some beautiful subjects this spring to capture with a lens as well as a bit of added creativity by me.  My favorite photo of the evening is this one...


The white in the middle is the moon.

And just to entertain myself, here are a few of the runner ups from this evening's photo shoot outside.



Apparently I was taking a while with my picture-taking. I had been playing with the lighting and the flash and the angles etc.   So, when I was just taking some of our front porch (with the thought of my last blog-sitting on the porch enjoying company) Dan peeked out to see if I was out there.    So here he is too. :)

How great it is that God creates such beautiful scenery for us to enjoy.  I hope I can continue to recognize and capture the little miracles; like flowers. 

Friendly Chats and Open Houses

I miss the days where it was acceptable to walk over to someones house unannounced and be gladly welcomed with excitement.  I miss the times of sitting on a front porch drinking lemonade in a lawn chair and talking about every day life.  I miss the casual culture of yester-year.  But is it really gone?

I remember sitting in the screened in porch at my grandparents house in NH listening to the brook and having "coffee break" and seeing friend's cars come strolling down the driveway, unannounced.  I thought that was normal growing up.  There was no need to call ahead (unless you needed a ride!) and there was no reason to worry about the state of cleanliness of your home.  When company came, they were greeted warmly and treated like family.   We'd pull out the donut jar, fill up another cup or mug of their desired beverage, scoot another chair closer to the table, and deal another hand for the card game being played.   And if the company could stay long enough, there was another dish at the table.   There was no feeling awkward as a visitor.  It was like one big happy family. And, just another day.

Time has changed.  Culture has changed.  It just does not seem polite to show up unannounced.  People have such tight schedules that arriving unannounced at someone else's home may inconvenience them because there is something that needs to get done or somewhere they have to be.  We have too many conveniences that make us not be able to just sit and relax and enjoy God's creation...including people above all else! 

Today I had the pleasure of taking my boys to a friends house to swim and just hang out.  We were invited to stay for dinner, and it just felt like there was a sense of that old fashioned charm, acceptance and friendship that comes with open hospitality.  There was no pressure to have a big fancy meal planned (although the burgers and bonus fixings were yummy!).  That is the niceness (if that is even a word!) of casual enjoyment with friends.  There is no show.  It is real friendship. 

I really enjoy the open door policy.  If we are home, come on in and make yourself at home.  I don't want to be the rigid type that has to plan everything out.  I want to continue working toward the casual, screened in porch dwelling with a donut and beverage, hoping someone randomly comes over to enjoy the company and friendship of my family.  So, here is my invitation...do not hesitate to stop by for a chat!  If you stay long enough, I will fire up the grill and cook you some burgers too. 

Thank you to my dear friend from today who reminded me of the type of friendship I long for!  You are a special family and we pray for you all often.

I Love You, Too!

Here I am coming off an Easter high...no wait, I am not coming off, I am continuing an Easter high with Jesus Christ and He continues to teach me. 

This season I have been extra aware of the sacrifice Jesus Christ has poured out on each of us.  I have been reading several books that have really captivated my attention toward God and reallocated my attentiveness.  He loved us so much he layed down His life for us.  Please, please do not let the commonality of this saying allow you to take it lightly.  He gave up His life.  For You.  For Me. For that person you struggle to get along with.  He died for us all.  Willingly.  I am an unworthy sinner...I can not even give 1 whole day to Him in it's entirety, yet, he DIED...for me.

Maybe you are thinking, OK, Kirsten.  I get the point.  I've heard it hundreds of times and I am thankful too. 

But, I just like to sit and relish in His love for me.  I am blessed with a family and many close friends who love me very well.  But, nothing compares to the love that Jesus Christ showed and continues to show each moment of my life. 

I was sitting here looking at some recipes and cleaning out my binder to make room for the new recipes (and take out the ones that were tried and not so appealing) and I decided to put in a Beth Moore devotional CD that I bought over the weekend.  I got to a message entitled Breaking Free.  I was listening half heartedly and semi attentively (of course leaving some attention to reading my recipes in the midst of the CD).  Then she mentioned a challenge to the listeners.  Beth asked that when ever we want to say "I love you, Lord" to in fact say, "I love you, too".  "When we are feeling like we want to express our love to Him, He has already showed us His love and we are reciprocating that thought back to Him. And, never, ever will you ever say I love you and He has not just said it to you.  He is the initiator of love.  He is the source of love. " The only reason I can love Him is because God is the initiator of Love and has loved me first!

Thank you, Beth Moore, for this reminder of great love and for the challenge to remember that He is the source and initiator of love. 

God, Please help me to be more reciprocal of this GREAT gift.  Help me to love you well.

No TV is liked by Me

Zack's school has given the challenge to families of turning off their tv for a week.  7 days of no watching tv.  It has been interesting to comply with this request.  Our routine weekday screen time was for about 30 minutes in the mornings before school, then occasionally after school for 30-45 minutes.  The weekends are a bit more with Sunday mornings before church shows and Saturday morning cartoons and sometimes some Wii in the afternoon.  I do not think it is excessive, but I always prefer other things for the boys over tv.
Anyway, here is our past several days...
Day 1 (We started on Sunday)  The kids asked probably a dozen times if they could watch something.  It is after all, their favorite day to watch tv, especially in the mornings.  Dan and I reminded them each time that there would not be tv.  It was a big adjustment (yes, I am embarrassed that it was so difficult!).
Day 2 We were very busy this day, visiting friends and having a late meal so it was not even thought about...Yea!
Day 3 This was also a busy day although they asked to watch after school a couple times.  Both Zack and Owen asked me (in hopes that I would say yes to one of them I think!) but I held firm.  They found alternative things to do and moved on quite quickly. 
Day 4 The kids did not even ask to watch although they had several moments of not knowing what to do. 
Day 5 Again, the kids did not ask to watch.
Day 6 (today) they have not asked to watch and it is a day off from school.  I am so proud of them. 
I am really enjoying them finding alternative ways to enjoy the day.  There is much less fussing and whining.  I have attributed that to tv too.  For some reason the kids can get so grumpy when it is time to turn off the tv or to turn off video games.  I have never understood this.   And, because they have poor attitudes it has limited much of the games they are "allowed" to play and limited the amount of tv watching they are able to watch. 
So, instead of tv, we have replaced it with things that are fun and that occupy some down time.  Today, we had a busy day getting ready to go to MN for Easter.  The kids and I cleaned the playroom (a bit too long awaited if you ask me!), we went to the library, and then the grocery store to get a couple ingredients to make dirt cake, they helped with some laundry and did a couple outside jobs to help me get extra stuff out for the garbage man.  Then, after lunch the kids and I made the dirt cake to bring to MN and the boys have been playing...without asking to watch tv!  I also have plans to make some donut muffins http://www.kingarthurflour.com/recipes/doughnut-muffins-recipe to have for breakfast tomorrow.  Then, it will be off to MN! 
This no tv thing...I am really liking it!  I am looking forward to warm weather that will be incentive to permanently replace much screen time by enjoying creation. 
As for the past 6 days, I am proud of my boys for their lack of tv!

The Judgement Factor

I am not God.  Seems quite obvious to you.  But, I need a reminder every now and then.  It gets so comfortable for me to complain about how other people do things.  I have the audacity to think that my way is the best or only way and everyone else's is skewed somehow if it does not follow my way of thinking.  I have realized lately that my judgement factor on others has been too harsh and is shameful.  Many of us are trying hard to be obedient to His calling.  When I say someone is wrong, then I am attempting to be omniscient.  There is only One who is omniscient...and suffice to say, it is not me.  (I am sorry if I have shocked you!) :) 

Being a parent, it is easy to judge other parents and how they raise their children.  When their style does not match mine closely I can get thoughts of "if only they did this differently".  I do not want to carry around those feelings.  I want to carry around feelings of compassion toward the children and the parents.  In an honest evaluation, it is quite obvious that parents are never going to agree with other parents 100% in their upbringing of children.  It is also quite obvious that no set of children are exactly like another set of children.  We were all created uniquely in God's image and He has blessed us with the family he gave us and hand picked the children especially for our family's.  It is easy to say "You are wrong to..." and "if only..."  in regards to how parents parent their children.   But, those children have different demeanors and attitudes from my children.  What may work for mine, may not work for yours...and what works for yours may not work for mine.

It is not my place to judge your family, nor is it your place to judge mine.  Psalm 96:13 says: Let all creation rejoice before the LORD, for he comes, he comes to judge the earth. He will judge the world in righteousness and the peoples in his faithfulness.  So, according to this verse, it is not for us to judge, but it IS my place to rejoice before the Lord.  I need to leave the judging to the true Judge.  The God of the Heavens and Earth.  The God of Creation.  The Maker of families and the human race.  I did not make the world and do not know the situations that God is working on in each family.  I do know that He will be judging with equity (the achievement of fairness). 

I have been thinking about this topic for quite a while now.  I want to have boldness if God wants to use me, but I want to know the difference between boldness and animadversion.   I hope that I am not alone in this whole judgement discussion and working on humility and parting ways with sinful thoughts...well, rethinking that...I hope that I AM alone and that now we can move on and REJOICE before the Lord together!!